Lol and Vince practically sprinted out of the office after Richmond. Lol knew in her mind what he was going to do. He was going to ask for a promotion. The words echoed around in Lol's head. If he did that, there would be no going back. The universe could change so drastically, herself and Vincey may cease to exist. And Lol couldn't leave her brothers alone, the cat would eat them. Lol ran as fast as she could, dodging all manner of office equipment randomly being thrown through the corridors. But then a monitor was thrown straight down the corridor, with a huge post-it that read "GET THE BLOODY I.T. GUYS TO FIX IT". It soared over Lol's head, and she let go a sigh of relief. But then she heard a great thud and a squeal of pain. She looked behind her, and Vince had been knocked out cold.
"Poor Vince. Why did he have to be taller than me?" Lol thought, but soldiered on, for there was a universe to save. She caught up with Richmond just about to get in to the lift to the main office.
"RICHMOND! DON'T DO IT!" Lol screamed, "If you ask for a promotion I might cease to exist!"
Richmond stood there, looking rather shocked. It was a true Eastenders moment.
Monday, 23 August 2010
Lol K. Plantpot: Chapter 18
Lol felt very sorry for Richmond, and leaving Vince to introduce himself to the IT guys she went through the red door.
She was in a room with four large black boxes, with red lights blinking on them. There were a couple of chairs, but apart from that the place was empty.
"Richmond?" asked Lol nervously. He dropped down from his hiding place on the ceiling.
"Go away." he said, keeping his back turned to her.
"Oh come on RichAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Richmond had finally turned around, and the sight that confronted Lol was an awful one indeed. His hair was short and blonde, his face-makeup free, and he wore an ordinary grey suit.
"What are you doing?" asked Lol incredulously.
"Well, since no-one likes me as a goth, I'm going to be normal, now excuse me." He went back out into the office, passed the sparkling Vince without a word and left.
"We've upset Richmond." said Lol to Vince.
"Who's that again?" he asked with a blank face.
"The goth." Lol said, annoyed.
"Oh right." Vince stared into no where for a second and then suddenly crumpled into a tiny ball. He stood up again wearing a hawain shirt, a pair of khaki shorts and awful shoes.
"Nooooooo! Richmond must have upset the dimensions of the universe! Him becoming normal means the rest of us have to change as well. My god, I look like Howard!" Vince started to cry and Lol just sighed.
By Ed the Neon Pirate
She was in a room with four large black boxes, with red lights blinking on them. There were a couple of chairs, but apart from that the place was empty.
"Richmond?" asked Lol nervously. He dropped down from his hiding place on the ceiling.
"Go away." he said, keeping his back turned to her.
"Oh come on RichAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Richmond had finally turned around, and the sight that confronted Lol was an awful one indeed. His hair was short and blonde, his face-makeup free, and he wore an ordinary grey suit.
"What are you doing?" asked Lol incredulously.
"Well, since no-one likes me as a goth, I'm going to be normal, now excuse me." He went back out into the office, passed the sparkling Vince without a word and left.
"We've upset Richmond." said Lol to Vince.
"Who's that again?" he asked with a blank face.
"The goth." Lol said, annoyed.
"Oh right." Vince stared into no where for a second and then suddenly crumpled into a tiny ball. He stood up again wearing a hawain shirt, a pair of khaki shorts and awful shoes.
"Nooooooo! Richmond must have upset the dimensions of the universe! Him becoming normal means the rest of us have to change as well. My god, I look like Howard!" Vince started to cry and Lol just sighed.
By Ed the Neon Pirate
Lol K. Plantpot: Chapter 17
"VINCE! DON'T GO INTO THE LIGHT!" Lol shouted, but it was too late. Vince may have been pretty cool for a dude from another dimension, but he was damn stupid. Lol and Vince landed in a pokey little office full of computers and wires, Richmond standing there applying more goth make up. Vince got up, brushing the dust off his silver platforms. Him and Richmond both tried to help Lol get up, but as a result both collided and fell over themselves. Lol rolled her eyes and got up herself, just as Richmond tripped over Vince's scarf and crashed into a filing cabinet. Lol wasn't sure if she liked both of them fighting over her. It would only be a matter of time before Vince became a goth again and Richmond was rolled in sequins and glitter. Lol was sure they'd both scream the house down. Moss came in through the door of the office, saw the three of them, muttered "Oh flip." and promptly tipped coffee down his shirt. Roy then crashed into Moss, sent Moss' coffee flying, and tipped chips and ketchup down his t shirt. The coffee then hit Richmond in the face, ruining his make up and making him look rather miserable. You could hear crickets, then Vince's small "Oh dear." cut through the air. Richmond stood there, covered in coffee, his face twitching like he was about to cry. Richmond stormed through the red door with out a word, slamming it violently behind him.
"I think you may have upset him." Moss muttered.
By Nonnie the Emo Ninja
"I think you may have upset him." Moss muttered.
By Nonnie the Emo Ninja
Lol K. Plantpot: Chapter 16
Reluctantly Richmond lead them around a corner of the very small Zooniverse and into an enclosure that had previously been used by Bob Fossil for hiding his talk box collection.
"Here Bainbridge, come here boy!" said Richmond, holding a black lipstick in his hands. A snaffling, hunched over creature ran forward, snatched the lipstick and went to hide under a pile of Vince's old capes.
"You see, I got talking to him as he carried me off to perform his diabolical experiments, and I think I convinced him to become a goth." Richmond's face stayed as still as ever but he radiated an aura of shame. Lol sighed.
"Well, he's probably fine like that for now. I quite like this universe..." she said randomly, admiring the shabby Zooniverse.
"Stay here then" said Vince happily, passing her a tudor hat and playing his lute.
"What about Moss and Roy? I can't leave them." said Richmond nervously.
"Well, we can find a way to send you back. Got any idea's Vince?" Vince put down his instrument and had a think.
"Let's go see Naboo, I'm sure he's got some lotions and potions." Ten minutes later they were sitting in Naboo's living room discussing the problem.
"I'll open up a portal for you." he said in his monotone drone of a voice.
"Hand me that wand please, George." he said to a man in shaman's clothes sitting next to him.
"Is that your magical assistant?" asked Lol.
"No, he works in Dixons." said Naboo, waving the wand. A bright spiralling passage apeared, and Richmond walked into it carefully.
"Ooooooh, shiny!" said Vince happily, running through the portal.
"No!" shouted Lol, grabbing the back of Vince's leopard print leotard, but she was slowly being dragged into the closing portal after him...
By Ed The Neon Pirate
"Here Bainbridge, come here boy!" said Richmond, holding a black lipstick in his hands. A snaffling, hunched over creature ran forward, snatched the lipstick and went to hide under a pile of Vince's old capes.
"You see, I got talking to him as he carried me off to perform his diabolical experiments, and I think I convinced him to become a goth." Richmond's face stayed as still as ever but he radiated an aura of shame. Lol sighed.
"Well, he's probably fine like that for now. I quite like this universe..." she said randomly, admiring the shabby Zooniverse.
"Stay here then" said Vince happily, passing her a tudor hat and playing his lute.
"What about Moss and Roy? I can't leave them." said Richmond nervously.
"Well, we can find a way to send you back. Got any idea's Vince?" Vince put down his instrument and had a think.
"Let's go see Naboo, I'm sure he's got some lotions and potions." Ten minutes later they were sitting in Naboo's living room discussing the problem.
"I'll open up a portal for you." he said in his monotone drone of a voice.
"Hand me that wand please, George." he said to a man in shaman's clothes sitting next to him.
"Is that your magical assistant?" asked Lol.
"No, he works in Dixons." said Naboo, waving the wand. A bright spiralling passage apeared, and Richmond walked into it carefully.
"Ooooooh, shiny!" said Vince happily, running through the portal.
"No!" shouted Lol, grabbing the back of Vince's leopard print leotard, but she was slowly being dragged into the closing portal after him...
By Ed The Neon Pirate
Lol K. Plantpot: Chapter 15
Lol ran to where she heard Richmond's terrified screams, Vince following her closely and keeping an eye out for any sinister looking Henry hoovers. They found Richmond, cowering away from a short man in a blue turban. Well, when I say man, I mean he looked about twelve but had a slight 'tache. Richmond saw Lol and thought he was saved.
"Help me! He's magic and colourful and said something about sharks with knees!" Richmond screamed hysterically. Lol thought that by now, after all the evil Richmond had done, he looked rather pathetic. Vince, after changing his hat again (this time it was a white cowboy hat with blue glitter around the edges) he waved at the short man and said
"Hey, Naboo. This fruit cake giving you trouble?" to which Naboo replied,
"Yeah, this questionably scary bloke came creeping round the corner and Bollo went to hide back at the shop. He was well spooked, Vince." Lol heard Naboo's questionably awesome accent and made a :3 face with out meaning to. "We were gonna go to the Piney Ridge Shamansbury's to get some more frogs, what you up to?" Vince then explained the whole story from the time that Lol and Richmond appeared in the middle of no where, and you've already read that bit, so we'll skip it. Naboo then said
"Vince, I know you're the golden child of neon and glitter, but my advice to you is to never trust girls from uvver dimensions. They steal your socks and eat all your smarties. And usually 'ave over protective goth stalkers, but it's that's very rare. Tell me if you need any hair products, Vince. My shaman hours are 9am 'til 10am now. I'm working double." Lol had stood there like a lemon yet again today. Naboo left, Richmond stopped looking for a corner to hide in, and Vince yet again changed his hat. Lol looked at Richmond, and then asked,
"Richmond, what happened to Bainbridge?" As soon as Lol asked he started looking shifty.
"Um...Well, it wasn't really my fault, you know..." his eyes darted around.
"Richmond, tell us. NOW."
By Nonnie the Emo Ninja
"Help me! He's magic and colourful and said something about sharks with knees!" Richmond screamed hysterically. Lol thought that by now, after all the evil Richmond had done, he looked rather pathetic. Vince, after changing his hat again (this time it was a white cowboy hat with blue glitter around the edges) he waved at the short man and said
"Hey, Naboo. This fruit cake giving you trouble?" to which Naboo replied,
"Yeah, this questionably scary bloke came creeping round the corner and Bollo went to hide back at the shop. He was well spooked, Vince." Lol heard Naboo's questionably awesome accent and made a :3 face with out meaning to. "We were gonna go to the Piney Ridge Shamansbury's to get some more frogs, what you up to?" Vince then explained the whole story from the time that Lol and Richmond appeared in the middle of no where, and you've already read that bit, so we'll skip it. Naboo then said
"Vince, I know you're the golden child of neon and glitter, but my advice to you is to never trust girls from uvver dimensions. They steal your socks and eat all your smarties. And usually 'ave over protective goth stalkers, but it's that's very rare. Tell me if you need any hair products, Vince. My shaman hours are 9am 'til 10am now. I'm working double." Lol had stood there like a lemon yet again today. Naboo left, Richmond stopped looking for a corner to hide in, and Vince yet again changed his hat. Lol looked at Richmond, and then asked,
"Richmond, what happened to Bainbridge?" As soon as Lol asked he started looking shifty.
"Um...Well, it wasn't really my fault, you know..." his eyes darted around.
"Richmond, tell us. NOW."
By Nonnie the Emo Ninja
Thursday, 19 August 2010
Lol K. Platpot: Chapter 14
Lol thought about it for ages, trying to think through every possible way, but to no avail. She was about to give up, when a short but impressive looking man burst into the hut.
"I can help you!" said Dixon Bainbridge. Lol sighed with relief.
"How?" she asked.
"I will give you this magic potion, procured from the depths of India, when Vince drinks it he will be returned to normal!" Every sentence Bainbridge spoke was automatically ended with an exclamation mark.
"Marvellous!" said Lol enthusiatically.
"Aaaah, but in return, I want you to give me..........Richmond!" Lol shrugged.
"Fair enough, you can have him, he depresses everyone. Give me the potion then. Oh, and just out of interest, why do you want Richmond?"
"Never you mind!" snapped Bainbridge, before turning away and laughing maniacally.
"I can still here you." said Lol flatly.
"Oh." said Bainbridge, before leaving the potion on the leaf and chocolate table and leaving.
Lol ran to find Vince and fed him the magical potion, and he became glittery and sparkly and amazingly happy again.
"Hoorah!" cried Lol exstatically.
Suddenly there was a loud and surprisingly high pitched scream.
"What was that?" asked Lol, a little confused and scared.
"I think it was Richmond..." said Vince, who was in the middle of changing into a new hat.
By Ed the Neon Pirate
"I can help you!" said Dixon Bainbridge. Lol sighed with relief.
"How?" she asked.
"I will give you this magic potion, procured from the depths of India, when Vince drinks it he will be returned to normal!" Every sentence Bainbridge spoke was automatically ended with an exclamation mark.
"Marvellous!" said Lol enthusiatically.
"Aaaah, but in return, I want you to give me..........Richmond!" Lol shrugged.
"Fair enough, you can have him, he depresses everyone. Give me the potion then. Oh, and just out of interest, why do you want Richmond?"
"Never you mind!" snapped Bainbridge, before turning away and laughing maniacally.
"I can still here you." said Lol flatly.
"Oh." said Bainbridge, before leaving the potion on the leaf and chocolate table and leaving.
Lol ran to find Vince and fed him the magical potion, and he became glittery and sparkly and amazingly happy again.
"Hoorah!" cried Lol exstatically.
Suddenly there was a loud and surprisingly high pitched scream.
"What was that?" asked Lol, a little confused and scared.
"I think it was Richmond..." said Vince, who was in the middle of changing into a new hat.
By Ed the Neon Pirate
Tuesday, 17 August 2010
Lol K. Plantpot: Chapter 13
For Richmond, this really had an undesired effect. Lol was so angry with him for hurting poor little Vincey, she snapped. She took a neon pink lipstick from Vince's pocket, and drew all over Richmond's black cloak with it. Richmond retreated to the jungle to ask Tommy Nooka the Cheese Priest for some Cillit Bang, whilst his black eye make up was ruined with his extra tragic tears reserved for when he had to sit through an episode of Glee. Lol tried to switch the hoover into reverse, but found no way to undo Richmonds slightly better advanced I.T. skills. Vince had started to weep uncontrollably when he looked into a mirror and it cracked, and Howard had buggered off somewhere to write his novel. Lol didn't know what on earth to do.
By Nonnie the Emo Ninja
By Nonnie the Emo Ninja
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